Wednesday, February 13, 2008

True Love

Oh," said Eloise, "what's the use of talking? Let's drop it. I'll just depress you. Shut me up."

"Well, wudga marry him for, then?" Mary Jane said.

"Oh, God! I don't know. He told me he loved Jane Austen. He told me her books meant a great deal to him. That's exactly what he said. I found out after we were married that he hadn't even read one of her books."
--Uncle Wiggly in Connecticut, J.D. Salinger


I fell in love with Brig in part bc he read T.S. Eliot. Soul Mates!

Now I know he is far more enthusiastic about Sports Center than anything published. I love him anyway. Maybe I'd get bored with someone so serious he couldn't sit back and watch some Malcoms with me. Eliot was a terrible husband, by the way.


I think I also fell in love with him bc he had terrible acne as a youth, like me. Star-crossed!

It turned out that while my cystic condition may be one of the single-most influencial struggles of my life, Brig only found it to be somewhat inconvenient. But that is because he is confident and easy-going. And I love that more than I love sharing weaknesses with people (and we share some of those, too, and I don't find that as bonding as I used to think it was! Its a pain when no one can use their library card.)

While I was the type of kid who had such a debilitating fear of failure that I had to quit swim team because I could not bear the pressure to maintain my record, Brig was the kid who, though a pretty terrible swimmer, calmly competed in the IM and butterfly to ensure that he won ribbons (since few other kids competed). We are pretty different in some basic ways, but honey you make me laugh and you help me to believe in myself. Witness, above, wedding day aggitation with the photographer (who was really terrible, as I suspected) being calmed by my new husband, who has described his look here as one that makes it look like he "should barely be allowed to drive."


Moments later, I am appeased. This is largely how our marriage works. If only I had photos of him directing me over the telephone through traffic, I could provide an almost complete photographic illustration of our relationship.

I remember circa 1983 my non-member dad telling me, in response to my question, of course, that he loved his kids more than he loved God. Horrified for his eternal well-being, a made a dash for my prayer corner and probably said an entire rosary for him (no, I was not Catholic, just confused).


This day I began to understand how he felt.


The True Loves of Andrew's life. It is possible that Andrew loves these kids even more than he loves his parents, and certainly more than he loves "HIS" baby. I love my niece and nephews, too.


It was love at first sight of Baby Will.

Happy Valentine's Day to all three of my boys. Paul the Apostle said it best:
"I thank my God upon every rememberance of you." Philippians 1:3

15 comments:

Ashley said...

So sweet. That wedding picture and Brigham's description of himself cracks me up.

Sister Tara Bowen said...

That was so beautiful. You're an AWESOME writer!

Paul said...

I think you two are great for eachother.
So I was reading your quote (actually Brigham's) on our wedding photo mat this morning, and it makes me laugh every time- "Very soon it will seem like you were never apart. Remember the Febreeze." Happy Valentine's Day!

melissa said...

We all enjoyed viewing the photo of the kids. When i got to the part where you mention Andrew's great love for his cousins, Emma and Sam started "discussing" which one of them Andrew loves more. Luke could not have cared less, as I'm sure you can imagine.
love you, missy

Monica Rich said...

This was really sweet. I wish Adam would let me post about him. He made me promise not to, if ever I started a blog. I wonder of he really meant it...

Carolina said...

I have to admit that I have been checking your blog off and on since I linked to it from Lyndsay Petersen's blog about a month ago. I've been feeling somewhat guilty for reading your blog from behind a cyber-veil of anonymity. I kept thinking, though, that if I posted a comment, you might be horrified at the idea of people arriving uninvited to your blog. But I think you are a clever writer, and I love reading your posts, so I hope you won't evict me.

Michelle said...

You are a beautiful writer, yet still very funny. I love when you write about your husband and your boys....you are so sweet.

alexandra said...

Carolina! How are you? I heard you had a baby and that you are a professor at the law school! Congratulations. I am really flattered that you enjoy my blog. In reading Lydsay's and others from law school, I have realized that I missed out on getting to know better some really fun people. I am glad I sort of get a second chance over the internet, as strange as that may sound. It is great to hear form you!

Carolina said...

I had my first baby about six months ago (everyone in my family breathed a heavy sigh of relief--"she finally decided to have a baby!"). Coincidentally, his name is Alex (short for Alexander). I'm slowly getting more used to being a mom, but I sometimes wonder about my competency.

It is very strange to be back at the law school as a professor--I often wonder if the first-years are as scared of me as I was of my first-year professors.

I feel like I've hijacked your blog! Stop by ours sometime!

Mer Swift said...

Alexandra! I love your "No, not Catholic - just confused." And love how you describe your weaknesses as being debilitating, but not so for Brigham. So funny. I don't think either one of you have weaknesses that are debilitating. I love reading your blog!

Jenny said...

Thanks for your nice comments on my blog--I never know if I should respond on my blog or the commenter's blog. I just love reading your blog--so insightful and funny and well-written. And I can relate to so much of it. You say things that I have felt and would want to say if I were only clever enough to express them the way you do. I too have been introduced to the wonders of Sportscenter (and fantasy sports leagues) from my sweet husband. And I really can't count the number of times I've frantically called Mark for directions while I'm driving. I loved your description of how Brigham calms you down. Mark and I have a similar arrangement and over the years he has helped me to learn to not get so flustered in the first place (not an easy feat with me).

Audrey and the Boys said...

That is one of the sweetest love letters I have ever read. I hope you turn these into a book. Thanks again for sharing your thoughts with us!

Tat said...

(In Woober voice) You restore my faith in humanity. I love you.

Allie said...

I am so glad you left a comment on my blog so that I could find your blog! What a darling family! I really enjoy your writing style. Aren't blogs great? Does Jessica have a blog?

Lauren said...

I love how honest you are. I can tell you guys are a great couple!